The lyrics 'I get knocked down but I get up again' from the song Tubthumbing by Chumbawamba came to mind after I watched back a video I recorded in 2017 when I was struggling. At that time, my psychiatrist said, 'I'm doing my best to keep you alive right now'.

It was rough. Rapid cycling from mania then crashing into depression. I was unable to drive, unable to prepare a basic meal, unable to work at all. Now I can drive when I am up to it on quieter roads, can work around 8 hours per week, can usually prepare basic meals.

[1 June 2023 update: "It's my blog and I'll write if I want to...you would cry/laugh/write too if it happened to you" (my take on 'It's my Party'). Basically, I end up laughing and writing about some of the drama, as it's so ridiculous. This is a minimally edited version.

I have censored my previous first name in this post. It is abusive to keep using it. I have confirmed that even just using my old first name connected to my current legal name is enough to lead straight back to a public record that links to the business that leads to the main harrasser. So every time she doxxes me, she's doxxing herself, including her residential address. I can't be bothered right now to edit this blog post to make it briefer & to fix clumsy grammar, but going foward, I will not mention my former first name. I won't be bothered naming even by first name of any of these others that keep on keeping on with this drama. It's sh!tting in your own nests, naming me with threats, as depending on how good your research skills are, public records I can't remove link to my ex. Unfortunately, changing one's name legally (for survival in my case) does not completely remove them from cling-ons. It's how business laws are set up. Rise above it like the phoenix].

"It's my party" (Lesley Gore) is my earworm so I am listening to it as I write this post. On this old blog that I have been leaving behind to fly away from the drama that never ends. If stay silent, the abuse continues. If say something, the abuse continues. This blog post is dedicated to Chloe and her pals Charlie and Julz (Charlie and Julz used to be my pals, or so I thought). Julz's obsession and public abuse of me has gone on for 8 years.

Recently, I deleted the cesspool of thousands of screenshots from a single incident lasting several days. Abuse from strangers in an orchestrated pile-on that Charlie approved of. I didn't however delete the abuse from Julz (hundreds of public screenshots over years). Unfortunately, I can't do much about her, legally, even though the police said her ongoing harrassment is abuse. Given I have been made the scapegoat repeatedly (accused of being a bully and a liar by those doing the bullying and lying), I have written a few blogs post about the rubbish that goes down.

I wasn't going to post further on this blog, as I am moving to my other blog on Soar Purpose and I am leaving years of (mostly mental health and disability) advocacy behind, to move forward.

Something huge has been announced, all over the news in New Zealand and Australia past few days. Policy has been changed at government level with negotiation between the two neighbouring countries. Kicked off by the vision and actions of a vulnerable person 10 years ago. Which snowballed to bring about change to help thousands of others. I want to explain in this post the beginnings of how this happened, which has been swept under the carpet.

I learned this evening that there is a direct pathway for New Zealand citizens and permanent residents to become Australian citizens, with less restrictive eligibility requirements. For a reasonable fee, starting July 2023. The fee at time of writing this blog was less that Australian $500 with no complicated and very expensive (thousands of dollars) permanent resident stage first (that many had not pathway to start). There are still elibility criteria but they are much more relaxed than previously.
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It's already 2 weeks into 2023. I'm not one to make New Year's Resolutions. I'm always a work-in-progress with short-term and longer-term projects to keep me busy. I haven't blogged on here for a while as I have mainly focused on vlogging but I want to move away from that. In this blog post, I will sum up some of the past year and also where I feel I'm headed. I don't make super long goals, as things are pretty unknown for me. I switch from one activity to another, all headed in the same general direction. 

I originally wrote this blog post in January 2019. Moved to here after deciding not to renew the domain name. In 2021, I published my first novel, Pet Purpose: Your Unspoken Voice.